Three weeks postpartum and time to think about what I’ve learned so far. I really can’t believe that three weeks ago today I had our little Monkey. When you factor in the sleep deprivation, it seems like forever ago, but it’s only been three weeks and time really does fly by when you have a baby!
When I was pregnant I tried to read up on a few baby books, but honestly, none of them really held my interest. I look at motherhood at a trial and error kind of thing and something that you have to experience for yourself in order to know what to do. All babies are different and all parents are different, so what worked for one family might not have worked for us. I tried to enjoy being pregnant, but I will admit that I was beyond anxious to get this show on the road and come home with a baby.
Oh, if only I knew just how different life would be… Just how tired Tarzan and I would be… I would have savored every moment in my pregnancy. No joke.
I think it was when Monkey was a 1-week old when I got a couple of emails from acquaintances saying, “Isn’t motherhood awesome?“, ”Isn’t motherhood heavenly?“, “Motherhood is the best thing I have ever done!“, and on and on and on.
Perhaps it’s just me, but I felt like I couldn’t answer those comments back truthfully because it was a bit premature. I mean, my baby was only one week old and, quite frankly, at that point I felt like I wanted to run away. I was an emotional mess (thanks pregnancy hormones) and experiencing the lovely postpartum baby blues.
Even now that I have a 3-week old, I feel like I can answer those questions better than before, but I’m not convinced just yet that it’s heavenly. It’s an absolute miracle that Tarzan and I created this perfect (yes, he’s perfect!) little baby, but the word that comes to my mind first when I think of motherhood is “hard work”.
Seriously.
I never expected that being a mom to someone would be this hard. I expected him to spit up on occasion, but not more often than not. I expected him to fit into our schedule, but I’ve learned that the ball is in his court: We jump when he is hungry, not vice versa. I’ve never had to schedule my day as much as I do now.
For example, I have to take our dog to the vet today and usually I would just pick a time in the afternoon to go. No big deal really. I paused on the phone with the receptionist for a few minutes when trying to figure out a good time for the appointment. I had to keep in mind the “schedule” that Monkey appears to be on right now: When’s he going to want to eat? When will he be sleeping? What’s Tarzan’s schedule like today since he’ll be watching Monkey while I’m at the vet?
So much more to think about. Life is somewhat complicated all of a sudden…
So I’m not quite sure that I would admit it’s the best thing I’ve ever done just yet. I have a feeling that I will get to that point, but it’s more hard than anything right now. However, seeing my little angel smile at me (whether it’s gas or not) just melts my heart and no matter how hard it is for me, I fall more and more in love with him daily. He’s so amazing and I know that one day I will be saying to someone, “Isn’t motherhood just the most amazing thing you’ve ever done?”
Here are some of the things that I’ve learned over these past three weeks post-partum, you know, since I’m basically a pro at this now. Ha, ha.
1. The swing is your best friend.
2. Music calms the baby down instantly.
3. Smelling like spit-up is like a new fragrance that you wear proudly. (The same cannot be said for baby poop and baby pee that just happens to explode/shoot your way.)
4. When you and your husband can sit down together, hold hands, and/or eat dinner, cherish those moments!
5. Make all things baby related funny so that you don’t lose your mind or yell at your husband. Laughter is best!
6. Mom juice (aka wine, beer, or whatever you fancy) will help you keep your sanity at night. I have a glass of something with dinner on most nights and look forward to it.
7. Do whatever you have to do to make the baby content. No need to worry about spoiling him/her this early in the game. Babies need to be comforted.
8. Breastfeeding and/or pumping is hard work. I hear it gets better after these first few weeks, but I’ve not made it there just yet to say whether or not that’s true.
9. Whether you breastfeed or formula-feed, I do not judge. You are feeding the baby the best you can and that’s all that matters.
10. Dishes and laundry need to be done all. of. the. time.
11. Sleep is a precious thing of the past. ”Sleep when the baby sleeps” is a bunch of BS so far. I’ve not yet mastered how to sleep when it is daylight outside. When the baby sleeps, I pick up the house. Or blog. Or twitter. I most never call people back on the phone though. I need to work on that. Really.
12. Baby stuff is quite expensive. I was at Target the other day picking up a few items: Diapers, onesies, bottles, etc and I left spending about $150. Just like that.
13. As hard as it might be, don’t forget about your dog in this whole process. I’ve noticed that our dog has changed and T. and I do our best to try to keep up with his old routine, but it is hard. And when you are holding a baby it’s nearly impossible to put him on the couch, feed him dinner, give him treats, etc. (As you can see, I’ve not yet mastered the whole doing things with one hand.)
14. Having a baby has brought Tarzan and I even closer. I can’t imagine bringing a baby into this world without a wonderful partner like him. Thanks little Monkey for making your parents fall more and more in love with each other!
You might also want to read:
- Leaving the hospital: The days after and experiencing postpartum baby blues
- 40 things about what to expect after labor and delivery, childbirth, and coming home that no one told me
- 10 ways our baby has told me how much he loves me and how to tell if your baby loves you!
- What I learned on my 1st Mother’s Day
- Our Baby Feeding Schedule: A day in the life of Tarzan, Jane, and Monkey. Welcome to no sleepville.
I'm so glad I found this site...just a little late to the party. I am three weeks postpartum with baby #2, and wondering why there is no manual for us? Lots of advice for the baby, week by week, day by day, but after delivery it seems like we're on our own! Like you, I've been experiencing some unexpected challenges, emotions, and experiences. But it is starting to get better. Looking forward to enjoying your blog :).
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