Past memory of postpartum depression, breastfeeding Monkey, & my dog

Postpartum depression hit me like a thousand tons of bricks. Not fun. But it started to fade at about 4-5 months thank goodness!!! I know how you feel!
Our cats surprisingly love our almost 8 month old daughter. They even allow her to gently grab their fur and scream happily at them. They really love her, I can't believe it! But, yeah, they are not as spoiled as they used to be but their lives are still good.

Hi "Jane,"

I am amazed by how much some of your posts here seem to echo my experience with post-partum depression and OCD. The night after my son was born, my mom said to me, "Isn't this better than having a cat?" I just stared at her for a minute, and as I recall, replied, "I don't know about that."

I suffered from hellish PPD/OCD for the next eight months and after that was able to realize that my little boy is the most wonderful gift I could have ever been given, in ways I wasn't even able to imagine when I was pregnant with him, and ways I could have never dreamed possible when enduring PPD.

Now that I'm pregnant again, your post about wanting 3 more children was a bit familiar as well. There was a long time when, even though I thought I might want more children someday, I couldn't think about the realities of a possible recurrence of PPD. Then, finally, I said to myself, "It will be okay." A few days ago, the thought hit me, "What if it's not okay? What if this was a mistake?" Yet now I have the strength that I earned during my first postpartum and through learning to love my son.

Anyway, this is a wonderful blog. Good for you for having the courage to share your story in such a public manner so soon after your son was born! If you ever want to talk, send me an e-mail, though I'm sure you get many women telling you they share your story. And in case you didn't know about it.. http://postpartumdepression.yuku.com

It's a great resource for women who have or have had PPD.

Meghan

I'm right there with you but sub in cat for dog. When the PPD dust clears...

Amazing how when the dust clears how awesome it is to be a mum.

Sorry - "I'm tears" should be "I'm in tears". How I wish these comment fields had spell check...sigh.

Omigosh... I am tears reading this. I can't begin to tell you how much it means to me to read this post because I had the EXACT same experience.

My dog was our baby. He got me through 2 miscarriages and I love him so much it is ridiculous. I remember coming home from the hospital, already under the grip of PPD, and sobbing when I saw him. I felt like I had betrayed him, bringing this other being into our lives, one who would take all my attention away from him. And while I knew I loved my baby, I didn't KNOW him like I knew my dog; I felt weird about having to give all my time and energy to someone I barely knew when my little furry baby was looking at me with so much love in his eyes, and I was neglecting him...

One wonderful LC I worked with suggested that I use my pumping time as "Dizzy time" (my dog's name is Dizzy). I would go in the bedroom and pump and Diz would come lay on the bed with me and snuggle. It was my happiest time of day (which was ironic considering what a PITA pumping ended up being) for those first few weeks.

And now... man, things have changed. Now I feel guilt b/c poor Diz has taken second place. But that's another story. I can't believe the ridiculous amount of love and obsession I feel for my son. Of course, I still love Diz to pieces... but, well, I don't need to explain this to you. You obviously get it.

I seriously think you and I are living parallel lives. Our husbands seem a lot alike too, at least from the post he wrote defending you against the BFing zealots, which is one of my favorite blog posts EVER. :)

This is so true. We had UNBELIEVABLE patience with our dear cat before the baby came. I think he sensed I was pregnant and didn't handle change well and started "marking his territory" all over the house, especially on baby items. We decided after trying everything that we couldn't handle him anymore. It's sad, yes, but a baby is more important. I didn't want to risk anything. I loved him, but as a cat. I think my fiance took it a bit harder though :(

I'm so relieved that we don't have a dog or cat. Taking care of a baby and a husband is plenty for me! I grew up with cats and dogs and remember well how much care they require and while it's nice to have a pet, I'm so glad I don't have that responsibilty now, though when Henry gets older he may want a dog or a cat and we'll see what happens then.

I have two cats whom I love dearly. I cuddled them and showered them with affection.. Until my daughter was born 3 weeks ago. I was so completely wrapped up in her (and so overwhelmed trying to figure out how to balance taking care of her and taking care of normal, mundane duties) that I actually forgot to feed them for an entire day.

They are now no longer welcome in our bedroom because it's where she sleeps. When I'm cuddling with her, I have to push the cat down when he tries to sit on her. Sometimes I feel bad, but I realize that eventually things will become a little more normal, calm down and I'll be able to pay more attention to them. But for now, they're going to have to get used to being 2nd and 3rd.

I have two cats at home who have taken a backseat for a while, and showed their disproval. Now that my baby is 6 months old things are settling down and they are getting more attention. I love them, but it is not the same way I love or care for my baby. It also gets to me when someone compares taking care of their dog or cat with me taking care of my little one. Babies are much harder to care for especially when the fear of not doing it right is looming overheard. Nice post though, I understand it completely.

I feel horrible for my dog. We had to give him to my future father-in-law. He's a little older and we don't trust him with the baby coming. I'm due in 8 weeks and we gave him away back in November. It's been hard on me because he's my baby, and he's spoiled. We still go over and visit all the time, but I know it will be harder once our daughter comes along :o(. Good luck with the juggling!