1) Just found out my wife is pregnant again. It will be our second. Very unexpected since I had a vesectomy 6 months after our first. I was very happy about being the father of one. I’m now freaking out about being the father of two. Right now its to the point where I can’t function normally or think of anything else. Forgot to tell you we’re also self employed but with me working from home my business mostly went to the wayside in place of playing the role of stay at home dad. I didn’t handle it very well at first but once through the baby part (1st was 2 in march) I would say about a year into it I really started to appreciate being at home with my little girl. As for worrying about how to take care of your baby it really does just come natural. I was 42 when we had our first (wife only 28 he he) and I had never raelly had any contact with babies or kids my whole life. At my age its stressful other reasons. All my friends who have children are almost done. They’re looking foward to their upper 40’s and fifties. My first won’t even graduate until I’m 60. It’s hard dealing with babies when you’re my age and I’m in good shape for my age. But my back hurts a lot and you’re just not quite able to do things like you were in your early 30’s or 20’s for that matter. My wife being 30 now thinks I’m just making 1/2 of it up to get out of doing things but at 44 with a ruptured disc when I was in my 30’s the pain is real and constantly bending over or getting up and down isn’t easy. Since I look 10 years younger than I am she always forgets about the age difference. I was starting to think I had made it through the hardest part work wise and now here I am starting at the beginning again. We just found out the new last Friday and I’m just still in shock and not handling this well at all yet.

2) This would be for the future and I wish someone had told me. Don’t ever trust a vesectomy as your only form a birth control when you decide you don’t want anymore. Since I found out last wek about the pregnany I already know of 5 guys between our friends that this has happened to. Right after the surgery your almost assured there will be no sperm in your semen but over time as the body work to repair and re-connect what someone went in and cut its very easy to become fertile again. One guy I know took back a semen sample at 3, 6 and 12 months until he felt safe enough for them to stop using other birth control and 6 months after that his wife got pregnant again. He took his semen in to get checked and they found 2 and since it only takes 1 well there you go. You can’t go back at the doctor because you sign something saying he’s not liable and you understand its not 100%. And no my wifes not cheating on me. We have a great marriage, a great sex life and she’s a goody goody girlie girl like your wife.

3) Insurance: Like you we didn’t have any for the first and since we didn’t think we could have anymore we don’t have any now. Here’s a lesson also. They tried to induce labor the first time because my wife had low ambiotic (not sure of spelling) fluid and Dr wanted to deliver a couple weeks early so the baby wouldn’t get any bigger. When they started and the first contraction started they lost the heart beat for few seconds. They said they were going to try it again and I asked them to leave the room. I told my wife there is no way we’re letting them try that again. If the first couple small contractions caused to much pressure and stopped the heart what were the real ones going to do? She told me all she cared about was a healthy baby to go with what I thought was best because with all they had done to her through out the night she already wasn’t thinking the clearest. I told the Dr to come back in and told him it was time for a C section because we’re taking any chances and lets get that baby out now! She didn’t even question it and said lets go. When the hospital bill came through the Dr put it down as an emergency C which meant our insurance (Blue Cross) had to cover 80%. The whole thing from beginning to end was $10,000 which we’re still paying $100 a month on. Also as far as hospitals go as long as you set a payment plan and make your agreed on payment they can’t do anyting so don’t worry about that. Set up a small payment and if you can pay more once in while go ahead but make the payment small to take the pressure off yourself. Don’t let them push you into a larger payment eaither. Tell them we’re both self employed and don’t make a lot of money and this is the best we can do. How much money you actually make is none of their business.

4) I’m glad I found this site. Writing this out and matybe helping somebody else has helped to take some stress off me.

5) It’s quite a ride, one you’ll never forget and honestly one I was glad I took once but never wanted to take again and here I go again! I feel I’m proof after getting a vesectomy that the only real birth control is God Himself. If he wants you to have another baby there’s no birth control in the world that’s going to stop it.

6) Boobs: My wifes are very large anyway but during pregnancy does the word HUGE mean anything.

Stay at home Dad

That does sound very interesting and I’ll check our local hospital to see if they have anything like that. I’d totally do it.

Natalja

I’m sure I will adjust as needed once the baby comes. It’s been a wild ride for the past 9 months and I’m interested in seeing it all unfold for the two of you. My parenting blogging will go full steam ahead soon. You’ve inspired me. I have been focusing on putting my other sites on more of an autopilot in preparation and other than my personal site and one other, the daddy blog will be my new obsession. I need to move it onto my server and off the free platform. I’ll do that soon. Keep up the great posts!!

Playing Daddy’s last blog post..Nursery Complete

Great to hear I’ve inspired you to get your parenting blog going full stream ahead. Let me know once you’ve got it up and running. Also, I suggest the WP Thesis Theme because you can do pretty much anything you want with it. It’s the best theme I’ve ever used.

Once our baby is born I guess we’ll keep this blog going and going to blog through the journey of parenthood. Will be cool to learn from each other and share interesting father stories!

First, congrats on your coming new addition! Also, congrats on your Nursery! It looks great. Once we know if we’ll be having a boy or girl our nursery project will begin. Where did you get your ideas from?

We sound a lot alike. I have my hands in several ventures, with most of them being online, but made the wrong move taking on some big clients and not building my own deals. So now I’m playing catchup big time – and the clock is ticking… It’ll be July before I know it.

Good to hear that you’ve had some of the same thoughts going through your mind about not being a workaholic. I guess we have to fight that caveman instinct to run ourselves ragged being the provider of food, clothes, money, etc. I think the fact that you and I are aware of the dangers now that we’ll do all we can not to turn into “one of these fathers”.

Thanks again for your comment – will be following your blog as well!