Saturday, November 28, 2015

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Father-to-be thoughts about first times and last times.

by Tarzan · 3 comments

father-to-be-thoughtsAs I sat there munching on some chips and dip while watching the Super Bowl, Jane looks over at me and says, “Awe, this is our last time watching the Super Bowl together just the two of us.”  I looked over and said, “yup, this time next year will be the first time we’re watching the Super Bowl with our baby!”

That small exchange replayed in my mind a few minutes ago and I came to realize something…

When Jane and I were dating, we’d often have the, “this is the first time we…” conversations.  Then when we got married, we had the, “this is the first time we… as a married couple” conversations.

And since Jane became pregnant, they’ve migrated to “this is the last time we…” conversations.  Now don’t get me wrong, of course we don’t mean anything bad by it, and of course there are no negative feelings about different situations being our “last” before our baby is born.

Once s/he is born (we’ll find out the sex of the baby in 2 weeks!) the conversations will be about the millions of “firsts”.  Our first family vacation.  Our first trip to the zoo.  Our first dining out experience with child.  Our first you name it.  It’s like when you have a baby a big “reset” button gets pushed in your life and everything is new again.  Even if you’ve done something a million times, it then becomes a big “first” again and another milestone.

Then as your baby grows up into adulthood, you’re talking about lasts again.  The last time s/he slept in your house before going away to college.  The last time s/he walks through your front door as a single man or woman preparing for his or her wedding later that day.

And before you know it, you have grandchildren and everything becomes a first again.  The first time your grandchild stays over your house.  The first time s/he gets into your liquor cabinet, the first time s/he asks you for money, and does so again, and again, and again…

Life is full of firsts and lasts… and they come and go in and out of our lives so quickly.  I guess we all need to learn to enjoy all the things that happen in between those firsts and lasts a little more, because we never know when anything will be our last.

The above sounds deep and depressing, but really, it’s not.  We can’t get all freaked out about anything being our last because we’ll most likely be doing it all over again as a “first”.

It blows my mind… the things that pop in and out of my head on a daily basis now are pretty wild.  It’s amazing how your mind starts shifting, twisting, and turning while it develops into being more ‘father-minded’ if there is such a thing…

Anyway, just a crazy observation from a father-to-be… it’s not the “first” and I know it won’t be the “last”.  :)

P.S… If you’re wondering why I have a picture of a urinal on this post, it’s because the site where I get images from had this photo as one of the results when I searched for “football”.  I’m not sure what they were thinking, but I just went with it.

You might also want to read:

  1. Pregnant Thoughts From A Soon-To-Be Father
  2. Another father-to-be realization: Learning the sex of our baby makes things REAL.
  3. Pregnancy Week Sweet 16? Jane celebrates by throwing up several times. I celebrate by cleaning up.
  4. Father-to-be woken up at 5 AM with severe chest pain… Pregnancy stress?
  5. I Scream, You Scream, It’s Me And Ice Cream? Pregnant Father Food Cravings? What?

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{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Jen P

That picture must have shown up because of whats at the bottom of the urinal. A “football” or soccer goal. Lol!

I’m 13wks now and really enjoying going back and reading your posts.

2 Helen

This is so true! In fact, this morning is my last morning to have breakfast with my daughter before she moves out on her own. She’s off on a trip to Calgary today and plans to stay for 6-7 months until school starts in the Fall again. I don’t know if she’s moving out for good this time, but this morning it really feels like it.
Reading this blog helps me think back to when I was expecting her. The anticipation and the day I found out she was a girl (18 week ultrasound) That was the day I knew she was going to be Alison and not just ‘baby’
Seems like it was such a short time ago– now she’s 19:-)
Hang on to the moments guys and take more pictures than you think you need to. There’s no such thing as too many photos of a baby or child. It just doesn’t last long enough.
Ok— off to take my daughter out for breakfast before she leaves!

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