While I was working upstairs, Jane was eating her breakfast and watching TV. I could hear her sniffle every minute or so, so I had a feeling she was crying… again.
I came downstairs and she told me about a video she saw on the Today Show that made her cry. A few minutes later I walked back through and she was crying again and she told me about how she was crying over something she saw on Twitter.
And now, just a few minutes ago, Jane told me that several people told her that crying and all of the emotions DO NOT END once she has our baby.
Uhhh… What?!
You mean to tell me that some switch has been activated within my wife that will make her become a crying machine? I thought that this was only during pregnancy because of the hormones? You mean I will have to deal with this…. forever?
Now-a-days I don’t do well when I see people cry – especially my wife. I don’t think Jane knows it, but every time I see her cry now, I start to get some tears in my eyes. What in the heck is going on here!?
Why do I feel more emotional? I don’t have pregnancy hormones flowing through my blood like Jane – and now me, the strong one, the one who never cries, the one who is the rock, and MAN in the relationship is feeling these weird strange emotions? I’ve seen Jane cry before and I’ve never ever once had my eyes get watery.
And now that she’s pregnant, when I’m in the room or I come downstairs and see her crying (like during a commercial on TV) I’ll start to get watery eyes. WHAT IS GOING ON WITH ME!?!
Now please understand - I don’t have any tears flowing – I just get watery eyes when I see Jane cry now. I need to make sure you understand that so you can keep your big and strong Tarzan image of me I hope that you have in your mind.
But seriously. What’s the deal here? Why the hell am I feeling ‘emotional?’ I’m a guy. I’m not supposed to feel these things or feel this way, right?
Please… don’t tell me that this is another one of those “not talked about things” that guys go through while their wife is pregnant. Seriously. Now I have this image in my mind of this secret “soon-to-be fathers support group” flashing through my mind of all these soon-to-be fathers all sitting in a circle, all crying about their pregnant wife, crying about a commercial they saw, crying about how they spilt some milk on the floor this morning, and all hugging each other and patting each other on their backs.
Image… please… get… out… of … my… head.
Are My “Sympathy Pains”
Kicking Into High Gear?
I’ve heard about the “sympathy pains” that some father-to-be’s can go through. I’m not sure I really understand exactly how that happens or why it happens, but someone please tell me that sympathy pains DO NOT include me feeling emotional? Seriously!
I already have a pregnancy-induced ice cream addition since Jane became pregnant. Yes, I still have ice cream each and every single night. I mean EVERY night now.
I’m starting to get a little freaked out here. I’ve been noticing all these weird things going on with me since Jane became pregnant – and we’re only in week 15! (Although she’ll be 16 weeks pregnant tomorrow! Also note: We’re in the second trimester – and still the big sex drive Jane is supposed to get while pregnant isn’t there! 
) We still have a LONG way to go!
At the rate I’m going here, I’ll be going into labor with Jane when it’s time for her to give birth to our baby!!!!!
You might also want to read:
= a post from Mommy Jane 
= a post from Daddy Tarzan
{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }
ha. you stole the words right out of my husband’s mouth!
Tara, I’d be more than happy to give them back if that means I ‘d shake this emotional thing going on with me! lol
Just don’t ever forget that you are pregnant as well
Are you in shock now???? You are going to be a daddy for the very first time, that’s special, scary and frighting but also extremely emotional.
Ok, for the next 25 weeks (and pretty much until the little one understands that bed means sleep ALL night) NO horror or thriller movies, no movies where a mother or baby dies.. even Bambi is out of the question, lol. It’s romantic comedy time for you.. and after the romantic comedies you’ll roll into the Pixar stuff, haha.
Don’t worry, the day will come when Jane will be able to listen to loud music again (of course not whenever the baby is around or in bed or within ten feet of the house, lol) and watch thriller movies. She just won’t be able to watch Bambi, ever.
It could be worse, when I was pregnant for the 1st time I was picking fights all the time for 6 months. 6 long months….
You know Jane’s in a vulnerable place and you feel protective of her so when she’s crying or upset, you get upset too. Sorry, it doesn’t end after the baby’s born. It actually gets worse. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve cried reading the newspaper. My husband just shakes his head and laughs a little now because it happens so often. And if Adia’s super upset, I’ll cry then too. Which usually stops her cold because she can’t figure out what’s going on with Mommy.
My husband came very very close to crying the first time he held Adia. I did catch him all teary eyed a few times and he can’t even be in the same room when she gets her blood drawn or shots. He can’t watch his little girl be in pain without crying. It’s not easy for Mommy either, but someone has to comfort her.
Crysi’s last blog post..Adia Burrito
You have no idea…
My wife was a cutthroat, corporate gal with ice water in her veins. I’m talking hard-nosed, take no prisoners, get this frilly crap out of here kind of girl. But then she got pregnant and had a baby. And she is a complete cream puff.
When she was pregnant I’d find her crying on the couch. When I asked her why, she had no reason. She just “felt like a good cry.” And even now she gets emotional watching A Baby Story and Bringing Home Baby and she doesn’t even resemble the tough girl I once knew. But as long as she’s not crying because of postpartum depression, it’s all good. Just realize she’ll be a total cream puff from here on out and accept it.
And for God’s sake stop tearing up. There’s no crying in baseball! =)
Daddy Files’s last blog post..I Scream, You Scream
Oh Tarzan… sorry to say, you’ve got a long way to go with the emotions. I can’t even watch the news anymore for fear that I’ll catch some story about a baby or child being hurt somehow. I can’t stand it, I really can’t.
It’s okay Jane! Let it out if you need to, and you too Tarzan! Pregnancy and children are emotional things!
@Cindy… uhhh… shock? Well with that statement, yes! LOL I agree with you on the movies. It’s funny, all I have been listening to since Jane became pregnant is soft and calming music. No joke! I’ve gone from listening to some pretty heavy and loud music to having Mozart and other classical music play in the background ALL day long. And when I drive, it’s some station in the 80’s on the FM dial that just plays chill-out music all the time. I haven’t really thought about this at all until now. Jeesh – another “weird” thing that has happened to me!
@Crysi Wow. It’s just so shocking to me how it doesn’t end, and even gets worse. Taking a step back and looking at all this, it blows my mind how much BOTH a mom and dad change throughout pregnancy. It’s like we’re going to be different people by the time our baby arrives. And come to think about it, the friend’s I’ve had over the years who had children acted a LOT different once their baby was born. Other friends and I would talk about them and how much they’ve changed and we didn’t understand why. I’m starting to understand why. This is some crazy stuff!
@Daddy Files… LOL There’s no crying in baseball is right! So crazy to hear about your wife. I’ve worked with many woman in the past who were the hard-core corporate type and I would have bet everything I had that they never cried in their life. But now I know no one… NO ONE can escape the hormones and emotions that pregnancy brings. Also, I just read your post about your wife’s job loss. I’m so sorry to hear about that – but glad you guys had fun at Friendly’s!
@bessie.viola… yup, you’re right. We both have a loooong way to go here! And staying away from the news now-a-days is a good thing to do I think even if someone isn’t pregnant. It’s too negative!
@Tarzan, try soundtracks, like from James Horner or watch Meet Joe Black .. if you start to cry along with Jane, you are ready to enter the world of hormonials, lol. It has happened to my husband during our first pregnancy and from that moment he wasn’t annoyed anymore but started to feel the same way
Good Luck.
Hi, Tarzan, I love your stories. Do you what your’re having? Mia
Thanks Mia! And yes, we’re having a bouncing baby mini Tarzan
Whoo Hooo! 